In 1986, The Scilly Isles – the beautiful flecks of Britain that lie beyond Land’s End – were finally allowed to relax. Why you ask? Because for the previous 335 years the islands had officially been at war with Holland. Don’t worry if you didn’t notice; no casualties were caused by the war, and there is a certain lack of confidence around whether war was ever declared in the first place.

Still, it’s a nice dotted line that connects these two corners of the world, and a reminder of the vast, complex and odd history that surrounds us wherever we are.

The world is a vast canvas, full of places that remain untouched by man. But there are also many places that were once bustling with activity and now lie silent, devoid of the life that brought them into being in the first place. The theatres and cinemas who’ve run their final shows, the abandoned building projects, and of course the towns and villages that have been left behind for one reason, or another.

A quick search will throw up dozens more examples, so go explore a world that at once persists and ceases to be…

The opinions and thoughts of people are fascinating. From the high level ideas of Aristotle or Kant, to the throwaway comments of Saturday night TV critics, we all enjoy a wallow in the insightful, the shocking and the absurd. But nothing illustrates the strange recesses of the human mind better than a brilliant trawl through the world of Amazon One-Star reviews, an idea I picked up some months ago from A Hard Day’s Blog.

It’s a simple game: pick a great piece of work (or one you admire for any reason), find it on Amazon and navigate to the reviews. Once you filter down to the one-star points-of-view, you’ll be hooked. And of course, you can do the same on IMDB for films, or any other review site. Now I won’t quote from any reviews here, but it is interesting to note that The Beatle’s Revolver has only picked up two one star reviews: one for a damaged box, and one for the remix of the sounds on the CD release. So some sense still prevails…

And if, after much one-star battering of the great, good and inspiring you need some way to restore your faith in humanity, you need look no further than the wonderful reviews of the Bic Crystal Ballpoint Pen, Medium Point, Black on Amazon. Superb.

Simply awesome work from Dan Tague.

Dollar bills revealing hidden messages. Beautiful. Simple.

Via the ever wonderful Quipsologies.

I go every year. Though was disappointed to find that from the age of 3-6 my parents thought in unecessary to drag me along. However, every other year, whether I recall it or not, I’ve been in Edinburgh in August watching shows, ignoring flyers and enveloping myself in a cloud of brilliance (I’ve become much better at blocking out the crap).

TOP 3 SIGHTS:
1. Paul Daniels, rabbits in hand, and Dave Gorman, sans rabbits, enjoying a chat by a crepe stall
2. Spotting two different people I recognise not because I have met them, but solely due to their appearances on the BBC’s University Challenge
3. A man who had made a chicken puppet from a bagpipe

TOP 3 SHOWS (Seen in Edinburgh*):
1. Sammy J – An Aussie stand-up with a gorgeous tale about a possum
2. Swamp Juice – A shadow puppet extravaganza that featured 3D shadows
3. The Horne Section – Alex Horne’s late night musical excursion

(*Isy Suttie and Adam Riches, both seen in London in preview, were sublime. Two of the best shows I’ve ever seen. So go see ‘em and take something to throw on stage at the end in appreciation. Nothing heavy or creepy though.)

TOP 3 MOMENTS:
1. Chatting amiably to a former Perrier Award winner and a disgraced MP within hours of each other
2. Hearing Axis of Awesome have also come up with my long term, LOTR inspired slur  ‘Dildo Baggins’
3.Giving what would have been the tip from a meal that featured terrible service (I’ll spare them, as they’re usually awesome) to the girls at Assembly Bar for being great on multiple visits. Karma.

When I left the house on Friday morning I had no plans.
No tickets for anything. No arrangements made. No hankerings to do anything much.
A quiet weekend beckoned, with some light pottering top of the agenda.
But then living in London that can easily change.

Step 1. Get invited to theatre. 4 tickets to Blithe Spirit (negotiated discount on the fly) bookended by pub. Friday night sorted.
Step 2. Realise, stupidly, that Scotland vs Brazil is at the Emirates – a stadium 15 minutes from your flat.
Step 3. Find tickets. Find mates coming to London for match.
Step 4. Warm up to tartan army induction pretending to be sensible at the Ideal Home Show. No magic vegetable chopping implements purchased.
Step 5. Shoreditch -> Blackstock Road -> Emirates Stadium -> Islington with beer in hand and football on mind (and a bit of sleep in between).
Step 6. Monday.

Locked in a Vegas Hotel Room with a Phantom Flex from Tom Guilmette on Vimeo.

There’s currently a bit of success happening for Peter Mullan’s latest film, Neds.

But if you’re not frae (from) Glasgow, then you might be unfamiliar with the term. Neds, are bams. Or jakeys. Or schemies over East. Or, to give the anglicised – and rather less poetic term – chavs. Basically rough folk clad in sportswear.

It’s a reminder, for me at least, of the rich language I used to enjoy growing up in Glasgow. The nomenclature of a city with real personality. Not the watered down lexicon shared amongst the blurred backgrounds of Soho mediaville.

So, in the interests of nostalgia and sharing here are my favourite weegie (Glasgow born) terms*:

• Bawbag, Boabie, Pie – Respectively scrotum, penis, vagina
• Nip, as in ‘wanna nip ma pal?’ - To engage in a romantic clinch
• Empty – A house without proper supervision in the form of parents/guardians (highlighted recently by Kevin Bridges I believe)
• Bufter – e.g. Elton John, Oscar Wilde, Louis from Pineapple Dance Studios
• Ya Dancer – Exclamation of something being most awesome
• Edgie – Keep watch. usually while setting fire to something in a classroom or stranger’s garden
• Polis – Police (Frost, not Sting)
• Teuchtar – Folk from out in the country
• Scaffie – Cheap. The actions of one who uses a plastic bag to carry around their belongings
  
• Rammy – A fight. Usually one with little skill on show
• Puggy – Fruit machine

Fuck I love Glasgow. I’ll be home soon, I promise.

*in fairness, these may well be in use across Scotland and beyond, they certainly don’t crop up in my London bound life. Sadly.

…that doesn’t sell crap.

Great idea from London based design collective Household, who have spent this Easter weekend selling items for just a pound in an empty shop premise in Hoxton. These are items of beauty however, and sometimes of use, covering greetings cards, jewellery, bags, trinkets, books and more. The best item I picked up, was a pad of rubber, designed specifically for drawing on with a biro. You know that feeling, it’s nearly as good as drawing on a banana with a biro. Oh how I smiled.

One more day to go, so get yourself to Hoxton Street.